A Third World nation, with love
By Sheryl-Lee Kerr
Some people really are impossible to buy gifts for. These are the
people who are so rich they can afford to buy a small Third World country.
Now I know what you're thinking: I don't know anyone who can afford
to buy a small Third World country, and even if I did, why would they want
one? And wouldn't a Second World country be better?
Well, no need to be snippy about it. Remember: those you mock today
could be your neighborly, Third World nation dictators tomorrow. And then
you'd be sorry you didn't get them gifts.
With that in mind, I've been cruising for gift ideas for the
mega-rich who have everything except that perfect Christmas present. A wire
story reveals there is an actual magazine for the mind-blowingly wealthy,
called The Robb Report, and the December issue presents a list of gift
ideas.
And this is the big league here, my friends - not a pair of socks,
jocks or box of chocs in sight. Instead, think: one $57.5 million, 50m super
yacht with a gymnasium and marble-floored lobby. (Because, as we all know,
marble is so vital to yachts. Especially when they're sinking.)
A 485hp V12 Ferrari 550 Barchetta Pininfarina limited-edition convertible. Yours for a
mere $494,000. (Floor mats probably extra.)
A $623,000, 21-day safari package complete with a pair of 12-bore
shotguns and a Range Rover. (Pfft, but are the shotguns bonnet-mounted?)
Or a $14 million set of four Patek Philippe pocket watches, one of
which accurately copies the chime of London's Big Ben clock tower. (For an
extra $1.50, it'll do The Macarena, too.)
No good? Well The Robb Report also advertises future space flights.
For $9800, buy a Zero-G trip; $23,000 for an edge-of-space trip and $178,000
for a suborbital flight. (Ah yes, but is the floor marble?)
Frankly, these are all fine ideas, but I'm thinking what they need most is probably a
reality check. Best of all, they can cash it anywhere.
(Meanwhile, just send me the Third World nation. Oh, and the box of
chocs.)
© Sheryl-Lee Kerr & The Advertiser, 12 DEC 2000